In the movie I’m Not Ashamed, the true story of the 1999 Columbine High School massacre is used to highlight the life of Christian student, Rachel Joy Scott, the first victim in the school shooting. According to author and Christian apologist, Nancy Pearcey, the film does a good job of drawing attention to the underreported fact that killers, Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold, were likely motivated by Charles Darwin’s theories and Fredrich Nietzsche’s philosophy. 

As I read that tiny blurb today on social media, I couldn’t help but think about God’s grace and unearned mercy acting in my life.

Some of you have heard my testimony. I remember in my late teens, before Jesus rescued me, my worldview was eerily similar to the views held by the Columbine shooters. I was just as confused, lonely, and angry. Beyond that, I was an avid reader searching for answers better than the ones provided by the authority figures in my world. Darwin and Nietzsche gave me the naturalistic and philosophical tools that I used to build the framework for my racism, classism, and misanthropy. Furthermore, intellectually “seeing through” morality and ethics as ultimately empty and relative concepts was the first step in me ignoring and dulling my empathetic impulses. I remember consciously deciding to “maximize my pleasure and minimize my pain” regardless of the costs to others.

Some of you knew me back then and most of you know me now. The regenerating work of The Holy Spirit along with a robust understanding of the Christian worldview may have, for all I know, saved me from committing atrocious crimes not dissimilar to the crimes committed by the Columbine shooters. After all, we thought a lot alike.

Now showing in theaters, I’M NOT ASHAMED stars Masey McLain, Ben Davies, Sadie Robertson, Korie Robertson, Jaci Velasquez, and Jennifer O’Neill.